Fantastic Blue Riding Hood??

It was bad enough when Brooks told me he wanted to use our old Fantastic 4 dress-up jumper as this year's costume. I asked him if he would at least let me put some blue in his hair. Please kid, give me somethin!!! He says no, no hair color, no face paint, nothing. Good crap, who's Halloween is this anyway? So I'm about to take him to his preschool party and he comes out with this gingham do-rag on. I fake smile and use my phony sweet voice when I ask him, "Why the scarf bud?" He looks at me like I'm stupid and replies, "It's not a scarf mom. It's my mask!"
"Uh-huh soooooo...you're going to keep it on?" I say.
Brooks rolls his eyes and pipes, "Well I'm not going without my mask mommy."

Okey, smokey, I give up. I've never seen a Fantastic 4 comic or movie, nor has Brooks, but I can tell you this much- Heroes don't hang in da kitchen with Aunt Jemima, and you ain't gonna fool the wolf trying to save Granny with that headpiece either.

At least I have the blog to refer to when he's 16 and asks me why he's wearing the asinine kerchief. Happy Halloween everybody!

Some people make the world special just by being in it

Last night Karianne pulled out some of Trav's favorite shirts and we reminisced about them. I picked up a couple and my natural instinct was to smell them, but Kari had washed them long before he left us. I put them to my heart anyway. I cried a little and then sobbed alone later. The shirts hit me. I just can't believe he's not coming back. Kari misses him so bad. We KNOW Trav's in a good place, but our hearts are in pieces and it feels like everything's been falling apart since he went. Here's a small glimpse of what we lost

Quirky Tag

Some quirky stuff about me:

1- I like to devour a tray of ice after I eat. Most people like something sweet after a meal, but I prefer the crunchy, cold blocks. To my patients who are also my friends: Do as I say, not as I do.

2- Speaking of meals, I don't like them. I rarely eat meals. I usually only like side items. Steak and potatoes, keck! I'll just take the salad, or the fries, or the spinach dip with tortilla chips. This drives my boss crazy. If he buys us lunch, he adds an entree onto the side item I've ordered, and then I bring it home to Steve. After 14 years of employment, you think he'd change, but no.

3- I don't like to talk during Denver games. The kids can't ask me any questions, I don't answer the phone, and unless you need the heimlech, don't bother me. (Ang B.- I'd be happy to teach you about football, just not whilst the Broncos are playing girl)

4- I despise Steven's body pillow, who he calls Lola. I wake up with 5 inches of space on my side of the bed and freakin Lola has her own spot in the middle of the bed. He shoves her off mid-sleep and there she lays, all roomy and cozy. Steve will tell you that Tug also has maximum space in our bed at nights, which I cannot deny, but at least he keeps me warm and has a pulse. I dream of torching Lola many a day.

5- I like to put personal pictures with every post and it's bugging me that this one doesn't have one.

6- A friend once said that when I like something, I really sink my claws in. Also true. It could be a band, a book, a musical, a blue and orange football team, etc. When I get attached, I really get attached. I'm currently going through Matchbox concert withdrawal. Their tour is over and I get shaky thinking I might never see them together again.

7- I was born with an obcession to match colors, clothes, frames, decorations, basically everything. My sister Val always makes it a point to bring it up whenever two things aren't the EXACT same color. Brooks wanted a green room that didn't match his precious spiderman comforter so I've spent toilsome hours trying to tie it all in. We ended up compromising with two blue walls and two green walls. I also used to dislike character stuff, but I've come to realize that my kids' likes are more important than what's trendy or fashionable.

8- Jen hates the word socks, lol. I hate the word fiance. There's got to be some English word out there we can make up for one that is betrothed. Fiance just sounds like I should waltz or something every time I say it. Also too frenchy, yick.

9- I have specific requirements for a purse purchase. The cell phone pocket has to be on the side & outside the purse, there has to be an inside pocket for sunglasses, a separate area with individual slots for cards, license, & pens, and there can only be one adjustable long strap. I can't stand a purse with two handles- one for the shoulder and one that constantly comes off which requires placement back onto the shoulder. The long strap is so that every time I lean over, I don't have to give it a forceful elbow to keep from knocking me out. I wish I were the type of gal who could live without it, but I need the sanitizer, lip balm, wipes, tidestick, sunscreen, headache meds, & floss handy at all times.

10- I have trouble keeping things short. I talk alot, write alot, eat alot, ebay alot...wait, I don't exercise alot. Uh-huh, there ya go, I can show constraint on some things.

-I tag all my blogger friends & fam who hanker for a post that yields wee energy and little time. It usually gives me a good chuckle to learn about your hidden obscurities.

Flashback Friday

Wanted for witchery, E.J. at 5 months

Sweet Boy scaring the crows, 8 months old

The sweet Sundays of autumn

Watch a patient but deep offense, defense finally shows up, rack up some sacks, a few field goals and a touchdown, move to a 4-1 record - all while I get to kiss Cut's protege as he lapnaps. I do love this time of year.

I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much ~Mother Teresa

I once posted the title quote for other family members who were going through their own scary trials. I absolutely did not intend for it to apply to me. I still wish it didn't, and for the first time in my life, I wish I had not been trusted.

My Sweet Boy, our Brooksie, was diagnosed with Type I diabetes last week. Brooks was urinating every 10-15 minutes so I called the doctor for an appointment. The nurse asked if he had the 3 other symptoms associated with diabetes and I told her that he really didn't. She reassured me that it probably wasn't diabetes then and asked if I still wanted to make an appt. I told her that I did, if not only for peace of mind. I never received that peace.

Instead, we were told to drive directly to Primary Children's to visit with the pediatric endocriniologist. I had no idea Brooks would be admitted for 2 days and that we would go through intense training on insulin injections and carbohydrate counting. I will not go into detail because it still hurts to recall those awful moments when you realize your child's life is forever changed.

So here we are, day 7 of giving our son 4-5 shots and finger pricks every day. Watching his every move and pleading for this to be nothing but a bad dream. Pleading to trade Brooks places even though we know the bargaining is pointless. We're no strangers to this useless bartering, but yet we continue the process. I know there are many parents who would trade us diagnosises and I know that this will not slow Brooks down, but I am his mom, and this isn't what I saw in his future.

These are my fears: I am afraid that people will not ask him to play at their house because they are nervous about him going to high or low. I am afraid that Brooks will feel unnecessarily different from other children. My heart breaks to think or write about it. I feel a little better every day but I still get down occasionally and its those times when I am afraid that I will never stop crying. I am afraid that last month's ride to hell is not roundtrip. Perhaps I am not the strong woman I thought I was.


But there is a bright side, Brooks is tougher than I ever imagined. He takes the needles and pokes like an ironman. He seriously hasn't skipped a beat. Also, I know that Brooks is being looked after by a new spirit in the heavens. People will believe what they may, but when the main nurse walked in and introduced himself as Travis, I knew it was nothing short of a blessing telling us that Brooks would be okay with his new protector. And by the way, thanks Trav. We will count it as an exchange for that Spidey yahtzee game you two never got to play.



Here's the spideyboy himself, getting blood drawn like a real man-

Brooks liked all the visitors and especially his black spiderman poster from Uncle Jeff which he made sure every hospital employee knew about. Unfortunately the camera ran out of batteries so I only got a pic of Andy & Kim. Before they came, we were right in the middle of a very important lesson from the pharmacist and Brooks was running from the foot of the bed and then bodyslamming himself into the head of the bed. Loud and frightening lightly describes the sound of the amusement Brooks was providing himself. Andrea and Kim liberated us once again.

Here's Brooks hiding in the cabinet. When his doctor told him goodbye at discharge, he told Brooks thanks for keeping the hospital in one piece. The doctor jokingly said he questioned otherwise after the many visits to our room.

Primary's is an amazing hospital. Their motto is "The child first and always" and they do live by it. Brooks saw this lifesize statue first thing and was immediately excited to stay.

He wanted Spidey to have a green bandage too

I'll picture him doing the same thing to my heart-

I wasn't kidding when I said Brooks had everyone wrapped around his pinky. He was so thankful to everybody. The patient's mom in the next room came and brought Brooks some toys because she said in the two days she had been there, she never heard a boy so appreciative and happy. She said she had fun listening to him talk to everybody. When we were leaving Brooks said, "Mom, thanks for bringing me," and then he turned and told the nurse, "Thanks for poking me." (Here I go, crying again)It's no secret that we are huge Denver fans. Another tiny blessing is that Jay Cutler, Broncos quarterback, also has type I diabetes. The cameras frequently show him checking his blood on the sidelines. Brooks thinks its cool that he has something in common with Cutler. Brooksie wore his #6 jersey two days in a row this week and only took it off because some food spilled on it. I was born with orange blood so Steve was a fan by association, but now his allegiance to Jay and crew is rock solid. Brooks has the heart and ability to be anything he wants and he will, no doubt, make his dreams a reality as well. Nick Jonas from the Jonas Bros also has type I diabetes so Brooks has many role models to show him he really can be all he hopes for. For now, he's just happy that he can still have his favorite- strawberries, ice cream, and M&M's. Sure he'll have to take a little more insulin for it but it's nothing his body didn't provide on it's own before. I also find comfort in knowing there are two other angels above watching over Mr. Energy himself, aka Brooks. Before last week, I was considering ceasing prayer altogether, but now I'll be wearing the knees out, praying for a cure. The doctor and staff said there will be a cure for diabetes in Brooks' lifetime. Some even say, it's about 10 years away, so please try to remember that in your prayers sometimes. And if you're a close friend or relative, plan on running, walking, and raising 'cuz we're going to try and speed up the proceedings whenever the opportunity arises.

In the meantime, if you're looking for a noticeable change in Brooks, good luck because you're not going to find it. If there are any odds against type I diabetics, Brooks will defy every single one of them. This disease will not define him. Brooks will be successful in so many other areas that people will forget he has it.

And as for your question Brooksie if "I'm just keeping you alive," the answer is yes, yes, and yes. I will do whatever it takes to always keep you here with us my Sweet Boy.

A Golden Medal

Move over Beckham, there's a new kid in shinguards. My only complaint was that Tuesday couldn't get here fast enough. Brooks' coach dropped off his jersey and schedule last Thursday. To say that Friday, Saturday, Sunday, & Monday was pure and drawn-out torture would be grossly understated. He repeated the countdown of days in 20 minute intervals every bloody, scathing day. Then he jumped out of bed yesterday morning, threw his arms up yelling and smiling, "It's my soccer game today!!!" Well okay, maybe the previous four days weren't so bad after all.

I had trouble taking a clear picture because he was bouncing with excitement the entire game. Reed once said that we'd all be better off if we enjoyed life as much as Brooks does. Brooksie asked me one morning, "Mom, will everyone be there going like this - Go Brooks, Go Brooks." They will now Sweet Boy.

Brooks and cousin Skyla strike a pose above during pre-game festivities (is he working on his Ronald McDonald grin?) I should mention that Brooks did score a goal too. At halftime below, the cousins completely devour orange wedges as proof that they were not fed dinner before opening kickoff.

We paid Karianne a little visit after the game and Brooks insisted on wearing his uniform so he could show it to her. As they were discussing different plays of the game, Kari said, "You didn't score a goal in your first game ever, did you?" Brooks said, "No I didn't. I scored a golden medal!"

That's right Poshie, I bet your little David didn't score a medal in his first game.